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Anonymous Sayings.
28 February 2014 13:28 Post ID: #336200
Mick Jones
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A Best Friend is like a four leaf clover, hard to find, but lucky to have.

I'm old enough to know better, but young enough to do it anyway.

The Alphabet begins ABC, Numbers begin 123, Music begins doe ray em, and friendship begins with you and me.

Me: " Things seem to be getting better."
Life: " Just give me a second."

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02 March 2014 15:01 Post ID: #336427 - in reply to #336200
Mick Jones
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I wish I spoke Idiot so I could tell you off in your own language.

I'm not Bossy, I just know what you should be doing.

By the time a woman realizes her mother was right, she has a daughter who thinks shes wrong.

I'm so clever that sometimes I don,t understand a word I'm saying.

Marriage is a Workshop, where the husband works and the wife shops.
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02 March 2014 15:21 Post ID: #336429 - in reply to #336200
Mick Jones
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I've done that, been that, had that, felt that, needed that, lost that, and wanted that.
Thats why I drink to "That".

I don't Fart, I whisper in my shorts.

I wish I was as thin as my patience.

Life is full of disappointments and I've just added you to the list.

Life is like toilet paper, you are either on a roll, or taking s**t from some asshole.
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03 March 2014 02:14 Post ID: #336461 - in reply to #336200
Mick Jones
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I always try to cheer myself up by singing when I get sad. Most of the time, it turns out my voice is worse than my problems.

Most of the time, nobody notices your tears.
Most of the time, when you are worried, nobody feels your pain.
Most of the time, When you are happy, nobody see's your smile.
But when you Fart just one time.....

Girls are like phones.
They just like to be held and caressed.
But you push the wrong button just once.
You will be disconnected.

When I said I'd cleaned my room,
I just meant I made a path from the doorway to my bed.

They say that love is more important than money.
But have you ever tried to pay your bills with a hug.
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03 March 2014 02:30 Post ID: #336462 - in reply to #336200
Mick Jones
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I know the voices in my head aren't real, but sometimes their ideas are just absolutely awesome.

When my boss asked me, who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him every one knows he doesn't hire stupid people.

What I do when I see someone Handsome, I stare, I smile, then when I get tired,
I put the mirror down.

My wife told me I don't take her to expensive places anymore, so I took her to the petrol station.

You know your driving is terrible when your GPS says, " after 300 feet, stop and let me out."
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03 March 2014 16:27 Post ID: #336476 - in reply to #336200
Mick Jones
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Buying on trust is the way to pay double.

Happiness is not always measured in smiles.

To the world you are just one person, but to one person you could mean the world.

The Eiffel Tower is just The Empire State Building after Tax's.

Good Friends are like Stars, you don't always see them, but you know they are there.
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04 March 2014 02:02 Post ID: #336521 - in reply to #336200
Mick Jones
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A Friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.

Bad Habits are are like a comfortable bed, easy to get into, but hard to get out of.

A guilty conscience needs no accuser.

Going to church doesn't make you a christian anymore than standing in a garage makes you a car.

Nobody knows the age of the human race, but everybody agrees that it is old enough to now better.
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04 March 2014 02:13 Post ID: #336522 - in reply to #336200
Mick Jones
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The best defence to the atom bomb is not to be there when it goes off.

When ever you point a finger at someone,there are three fingers pointing back at you.

If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure.

Good friends are hard to find, harder to leave, and impossible to forget.

If you really do put a small value upon yourself, rest assured the world will not raise your price.
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13 March 2014 04:10 Post ID: #337360 - in reply to #336200
Mick Jones
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Today is a gift, that is why it is called the Present.

Some minds are like concrete, all mixed up and permanently set.

I can not be everything to everybody, I just hope I am something to someone.

I have not lost my mind, it is backed up on disk somewhere.

Flexible people don't get bent out of shape.
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14 March 2014 02:29 Post ID: #337404 - in reply to #336200
Mick Jones
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Marriage is the bond between a person who never remembers Anniversaries, and a person who never forgets them.

If you think patience is a virtue, try surfing the net without high speed internet.

I'm not clumsy! The Floor just hates me, The table and chairs are bullies and the walls just get in my way.

The Ideal man doesn't smoke, doesn't drink, doesn't do drugs, doesn't swear, doesn't get angry and finally
Doesn't Exist...

The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.
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14 March 2014 02:41 Post ID: #337405 - in reply to #336200
Mick Jones
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Its not important to win, Its important to make the other bloke lose.

In the morning you beg to sleep more.
In the afternoon you're dying to sleep.
And at night you refuse to sleep.

I know that I am stupid, but when I look around me I feel a lot better.

Due to current economic conditions the light at the end of the tunnel has been switched off.

Who ever said that great things come in small packages hasn't seen my big screen TV.
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14 March 2014 19:52 Post ID: #337447 - in reply to #336200
Mick Jones
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A bikini is like a barbed wire fence. It protects the property while not obstructing the view.

Cleaning the house while the kids are home is like shoveling while its still snowing.

A bald spot is like a lie, the bigger it gets, the harder it is to cover up.

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep - not screaming like his passengers.

Men are like bank accounts, without a lot of money they don't generate much interest.
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15 June 2014 17:04 Post ID: #342667 - in reply to #336200
Mick Jones
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And God created the Orgasm.

So women could moan even when happy.
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15 June 2014 18:08 Post ID: #342670 - in reply to #336200
All very good and made me smile 1975...
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